A-Team Episode 3×11
“Bells of St. Mary’s”
- Location: Los Angeles, California
- Tank: No
- Disguises: Mailman (that’s 80’s for “mail carrier”)
- Scam: No
- Flight: No
- Fixation: B.A., the True Hero
- Flips: 2
- Fee: Unknown, non-free
- Quote: “We all know the rule about clients… We never mess around with our clients. It muddies the atmosphere, it distorts our thinking, it is dangerous.” – Hannibal, referencing Article XII, Section 3, Paragraph 13 of the A-Team Rules of Proper Client Etiquette and Behavior. (Actually, it’s written in 3 point font at the bottom of that page. In Latin. With white ink. Not that it matters, I doubt anyone on the team has ever read a word of this document).
- Who is that?? Joseph Wiseman, Zeke Westerland. Hint: it’s crazy, but we’ve just had two primary Bond villains in a row!
I don’t really have a lot to say about this ep. It was fine–not great, and had some issues, and had some moments, too. The bad guys are trying to force a girl band to re-sign their contract and the girls would rather take the opportunity to sign with someone else. One of them gave us one of those yelling-at-the-screen moments when, after Hannibal has specifically instructed them not to leave, she hops in her car and leaves. If this were 24, she’d be dead. Thankfully for her, this is 80’s TV so it just means later, the bad guys know where her brother is so they can kidnap him as leverage.
The scenes with the boys trying to control themselves around the girls were predictably amusing. I will say I was completely thrown off by mention of a supposed rule about not “messing around with” clients. This is a huge retcon and there’s simply no way this rule existed prior to this episode, or else Face would have been busted down not to peeling potatoes, but to the guy who sweeps up after the potato peeler guys.
I will give a special call out to the main villain. Joseph Wiseman’s performance was great as an understated, down-home (but ruthless) billionaire recluse. The scene between him and Hannibal, exchanging pleasantries through a conversation both are certain they have the upper hand in was a pleasure to watch.
As entertaining television, it’ll do, but as an episode of The A-Team in particular, this one was a little sub-par. The episode was winding toward a final confrontation when, oddly, we won. No capture, no tank, just some gunfire, a flip, and that was that. The ending felt rather non-A-Team. I’m sure by 80’s standards the big musical number was a hit (actually I’m not sure at all, but what do I know?), but I do know this: Tank Buildin’ and Shootouts are timeless and hold up even today. 80’s pop music acts are quite a bit more of a gamble.
Special Feature: Cars of The A-Team
There are really only two, but since this entry was a little light on prose, I thought I’d highlight them here:
- The Van is a 1983 GMC Vandura, heavily modified
- The Facemobile is a 1984 Chevrolet Corvette. Fairly stock, though the paint is custom.
- The Bad Guy Jeep Ok, how could I not mention this little guy? You know him, you love him, but you may not recognize him if he’s not upside-down… It’s the CJ-5 Jeep, manufactured for nearly three decades, from 1954 through 1983. And flipping for many years after that.